Monday, February 21, 2011
Dressing Room Phobia
Very quickly clothes that I bought in the past couple months are starting to be undergrown. I am fine with wearing tops that are too big but I can't be walking out of pants or skirts. So off to the mall I go. Mentally it is hard to wrap my mind around that I can pick something from the misses department and it will fit. Unfortunately I am not in love with the style that is popular at the moment. The empire waist looks cute on skinny girls but looks like a maternity shirt on woman that have actually had children. I realize that my body will always be pouchy without a little plastic surgery help.
So this is my story. How is that I can walkout of two malls and an Old Navy and not find one thing that I like on. Is it that I don't like myself in smaller cothes? Possible. I think the reason is that I am afraid to go in the dressing room and the clothes still be too small. I don't like the mirror that shows all of your lumps and bumps. But on the other hand the lumps and bumps are just me and I am ok.
Needless to say I went to my local Old Navy and got a few tops that I did like and seeing pictures of me in them made realize that I have climbed a huge mountain of weight loss. However the pressure of putting the pictures up makes me pause. Do I want people to be surprised? Am I going to measure up to what they expect. I don't know what is holding me back, but as soon I am get over the hump I will let you know.
So this is my story. How is that I can walkout of two malls and an Old Navy and not find one thing that I like on. Is it that I don't like myself in smaller cothes? Possible. I think the reason is that I am afraid to go in the dressing room and the clothes still be too small. I don't like the mirror that shows all of your lumps and bumps. But on the other hand the lumps and bumps are just me and I am ok.
Needless to say I went to my local Old Navy and got a few tops that I did like and seeing pictures of me in them made realize that I have climbed a huge mountain of weight loss. However the pressure of putting the pictures up makes me pause. Do I want people to be surprised? Am I going to measure up to what they expect. I don't know what is holding me back, but as soon I am get over the hump I will let you know.
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Feeling A Little Under The Weather
Woke up this morning with the tell tale scratchy sore throat. I think a cold is on the horizon for me. I hate being sick but somehow I roll with the punches. The Y had a body pump class at 10:00 so I went in case I am not able to go tomorrow. I felt good to work my body out.
I went lighter on the weights since the not feeling great might take its toll tomorrow. On to the scale victory in case anyone is reading the blog. I jumped on the scale this morning and I was 149. I am so happy about that and the journey that I have been on. I keep thinking at the pace I am going than by swim season I will probably be in the 120-130s. I can't wait.
I went lighter on the weights since the not feeling great might take its toll tomorrow. On to the scale victory in case anyone is reading the blog. I jumped on the scale this morning and I was 149. I am so happy about that and the journey that I have been on. I keep thinking at the pace I am going than by swim season I will probably be in the 120-130s. I can't wait.
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